Wheatgrass, Health, And the Forgotten Secret of Success (Part 5) – Avoiding Success
Let me begin by stating a simple fact: I am and have been a multimillionaire with a number of thriving businesses who both follows worldly success principles set down in business and practices spiritual truths on a daily basis.
I am a champion of health, and I know there are just a few things anyone needs to do to free themselves from limitations of health and experience their God-given right to health free of limitations.
I’m going to give you valuable information derived from my own experience and by Mike Hernacki and his wonderful book, “The Forgotten Secret to Phenomenal Success”. In this article, I’ll extract several nutritious nuggets of wisdom from the last section of his second chapter “The Mechanism “Forgets” and add my own comments so you have two ways to put it into use for your own benefit:
Hernacki discusses “the fear of failure and the fear of success” in this section, which I call social engineering in my own comments below. He explains that, consciously we want success, deep down in our unconscious mind we experience conflicts between two different goals — like eating ice cream vs. staying on that diet:
“Fear of Failure, Fear of Success”
Hernacki starts out by showing the age-old idea that success is as undesirable as failure. He then explains some of the evolving theories behind this:
“Unconsciously, you believe you don’t deserve success:”
Let’s face it: we all believe consciously we deserve success. But deep down, some of us hold onto a feeling of unworthiness. Since Hernacki’s main idea throughout his book is that we’re naturally gifted with a success mechanism, how in the world did this feeling of unworthiness get there?
- Negative Motivation: Avoiding pain on the journey to success:
Psychologists previously believed motivation controlled our success mechanism. And some of the experiencing in pursuing success are definitely not motivating:
Rejection: asking for something you want (a pay raise, better hours, time to yourself, a date) and being turned down
Loss of identity: such as a woman standing up to assert what she wants becomes a loss of femininity because it’s viewed as a masculine behavior
Because of these possible negative experiences, someone who stops themselves rather than finding out if or not they happen is avoiding success.
- Rejection is society telling us our wants are socially unacceptable:
Later, psychologists saw these as learned responses to situations where people who reject us or criticize us steppping of our “feminine” identity are telling us the success we want is socially unacceptable.
- It’s a compromise between two conflicting goals:
Hernacki gives a clear example of two conflicting goals:
The goal of getting ahead (or getting along in life)
The goal of getting along with others (or going along with others)
There’s even a saying, “To get along, go along.”
Remember the conflict of staying on a diet vs. eating ice cream we mentioned above? If you’re alone, you don’t have outside social pressure. But what happens when you’re dining with acquaintances and everyone orders eat ice cream for dessert? You have the conflict.
- Failure is merely the successful achievement of a different goal:
Hernacki suggests we “avoid success” because there’s something we want more than that success.
The reason for this: you decided not to pursue a goal that someone else thinks is important.
So when you achieve that different goal, you are successful. Your phenomenal success mechanism is still working for you.
Hernacki points out that you don’t always choose what’s best for you and you don’t always know why.
For example, if your job sucks, you chose to return to “the job that sucks” every day.
I know you’re saying you know consciously why anyone returns: everyone needs money.
But deep down, it can also be due to conflicts (personal growth vs. social pressure, looking for a new job vs. risk of being fired before you find the new job) and on and on. I know you can easily write 400 “reasons,” some of which sound deeply psychological.
Hernacki finishes this section “Fear of Failure, Fear of Success” by stating some practical advice:
Start using your success mechanism consciously.
And he makes sure you’re clear that you might never discover the deep reasons why you haven’t experienced the success you want.
Whether it’s conflict between two goals… fear of being a social outcast… avoiding pain by stopping the journey of success… or 1 million other explanations, you may never find out. But you still can do something about achieving your success.
Now for my comments:
I want to add one new reason to the four reasons Hernacki gives:
- New reason: “I don’t know what to do or how to do it:”
We often can get stuck from moving forward because:
We don’t know what to do
We don’t know how to do it, even if we know what to do
Consciously, this looks like a reasonable to stop moving forward. But I found through my experience it’s really a “fear of failure and fear of success.”
Not knowing is very uncomfortable. That easily leads to avoiding the painful feeling Hernacki discusses.
And you can be afraid of looking stupid (Hernacki’s rejection) in not knowing what to do or how to do it. (I’ve experienced lots of criticism from people due to not knowing what to do in a situation.)
Further, you’re in conflict: you want to move forward but you “can’t” — meaning you don’t have the full-blown answer as a road map to follow.
Rather than achieving a different goal than the one you want (Hernacki’s reason #4), I have some practical advice for you, along with examples so you get it:
So how do you overcome being stuck due to not knowing what to do or how to do it? Three ways:
- Through knowledge: If it’s a purely factual matter, you can study and learn to overcome your lack of knowledge. I’ve gained tons of knowledge by reading and listening and thinking and practicing what I’ve learned. And almost all of it was free due to public libraries and the internet, so don’t make lack of money a reason fot not pursuing knowledge.
- Through the help of others: if it’s expertise or a connection to others that you can’t achieve on your own, start asking those around you until you find someone directly or someone they know who can help you. And the added benefit is this: that person you find either has the knowledge or knows someone who does.
All achievements are accomplished with the help of others. That help may have come through books and websites offering knowledge and advice. That help may have come from a mentor or advisor who has passed their wisdom onto you. That help may come through partnering with others who bring their strengths or resources or customer lists or active promotional support. But nothing in society can be accomplished alone. Even merely sharing something means you have someone to share it with.
Caution: Many people make the mistake of not involving others because they’ll lose some control over what they’re trying to achieve. And it’s true, if you have a struggling business and you bring on a marketing professional, you need to let go and have the professional guide the marketing. You might even give up part of your 100% ownership of a currently very small pie in order to have others expand the piece and make your share actually worth something.
My business partner experienced this with some potential partners who drastically needed his business and marketing guidance. The potential partners, both of whom were high-tech whiz kids with great ideas, had structured their currently worthless business so they couldn’t share the pie (lack of knowledge led to choosing the wrong type of corporation), wouldn’t share the pie with my business partner (fear of loss of status by making an outsider an equal), then stated they once the business starts making money, they feared losing control to professional investors such as venture capital funds. Without money and without offering stock in the business, my business partner had to walk away — he was not going to contribute his 25 years of business wisdom for free. And the worthless business folded within months.
- Through breaking up the next step into a number of small steps: Sometimes you look at the next step and it’s a huge one, like trying to cross a great divide in one impossible step. No wonder you can’t figure out how to make that one great step — nobody can do it! It might be you’ve fallen prey to a popular falsehood and are trying to do the impossible.
I see this all the time with people new to improving their health or in business.
Sometimes, you’ll hear people say your goals are too grand (“An Afro-American can never be US president”).
Others will say about themselves they want to achieve their goal much too soon (“In one week, I’ll lose 10 pounds and build my muscle strength” or “Within 30 days, we’ll triple our sales.”)
There’s a vast number of people who fall prey to multilevel marketers and online internet marketing gurus because of the false promise offering proven methods of going from zero to millionaire practically overnight.
These people fall prey to the illusion that they can cross the great divide in one impossible step. They then sign up or buying the product and are disappointed to find out, “It’s impossible to achieve in one step.” Then they think it’s themselves or the method they bought. Nope.
Notice carefully: I am NOT saying you cannot have huge and scary dreams. I AM saying my version of the Chinese proverb: “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” and requires all the small steps after that first one.
So, if you find yourself stuck with “I don’t know what to do or how to do it” ringing in your head like a Sunday morning church bell, move yourself forward by:
- Getting the knowledge about the next step
- Getting the help of others who already know the next step
- And breaking up that next step into a number of small steps.
Conclusion: You truly can have the success you want:
You now know that “fear of success” and “fear of failure” are merely only shadows on the wall and have no reality, substance, or power.
So… without anything holding you back, what’s really holding you back?
Absolutely nothing! Step forward to success, my friend!
Harness this wisdom for your benefit:
This wisdom comes from my own decades of experience of seeing the illusions of manipulation and not falling for them. I’m a health champion and have succeeded in healing myself and thousands of others with the “secret phenomenal success” power of wheatgrass. Yet there’s a popular illusion about wheatgrass. Like the revealing information above — not knowing what you’re doing on your “journey to success” — wheatgrass can have consequences:
W A R N I N G:
Serious risks in drinking fresh wheatgrass juice:
Fresh wheatgrass juice is the most popular form of wheatgrass. And yes: there are some serious drawbacks.
What’s one of the most popular ways to get your wheatgrass? By making fresh wheatgrass juice in a juicer.
Learn the risks of fresh wheatgrass juice [http://www.getrevved.com/articles/wheatgrass-all-natural-energy.html?ezine-wheatgrass-forgotten-secret-of-success-part-5-1] now:
Thirty years ago, I was sick as a dog and determined to get healthy.
This journey brought me to a simple yet powerful solution and a way to deliver that solution.
I’ve built on the power of wheatgrass and bring unique combinations of all-natural ingredients to help many people.